Happy Anniversary to me and Cravings....

We celebrated our 2nd Wedding Anniversary on Tuesday! It was really nice- we both took the day off and spent it in NYC doing "touristy" stuff. We went to the Central Park Zoo, took a horse and buggy ride, went on a Circle Line cruise past the Statue of Liberty and ate at the Carnegie Deli. The weather was perfect and I felt great all day (until we ate at Carnegie Deli. Apparently baby doesn't like Pastrami on rye and Knish). It was a loooong day for me- but alot of fun!

No pictures cause I have yet to find the battery charger for our little camera- and there was no way I was going to carry around the D60 all day!

I'm in the 1 month lull between OB appointments- 2 weeks til I go back. I'm anxious to make sure everything is alright. Whenever I have a day that I don't feel sick- I get worried.

TMI alert: I've never realized the human body could contain so much gas!! The gas pains whenever I eat something that's not bread are horrible!!

It seems the only things I've been craving lately are fruit, grilled cheese with tomato, bread and butter. Anything else sounds Ick. And if it sounds good for a bit- like the pastrami sandwhich (don't worry- it was fresh, heated pastrami ;-)) It doesn't work out all that well afterwards.

I'm back...

I haven't blogged in months. I guess I just figured my neuroses really aren't that interesting to other people, but I find it helpful to get things out there- even if I do sound crazy sometimes!

So, big news- I'm pregant!!! I'm about 8.5 weeks and we saw the heartbeat last week. Very exciting- and very scary! I'm also an Aunt as of 8/19- my sister had baby Alexandra Lauren. She's beautiful and perfect.

We are shacked up with my parents at the moment because of mortgage difficulties- which sucks. It's not bad living with my parents- I just miss having more of my own space. They're great for having us though- and, of course, I appreciate it.

Anyway, for the next 7 months I'll be using this as a pregnancy blog more than anything else. Symptoms so far: slight morning sickness (well, slight all day sickness), congestion (may just be allergies), EXHAUSTION-I feel like I could just sleep for days!! That's pretty much it. I've had a slight ache in my left shoulder blade for weeks now and today it's killing me, not sure if that's due to pregnancy or sleeping wrong.

Here is baby H at 7 weeks:


PS- for anyone who remembers my abnormal PAP fiasco- I've had 2 normal ones since then!! Woo Hoo!!

The Hunt is On....

for our first home. We've been looking sporadically for a few months now- but since there's been so much going on with a death in the family, a vacation and my anxiety issues-we haven't REALLY been looking.

I thought buying a house would be a fun experience- and I'm quickly learning that it isn't all it's cracked up to be. Of course we want the most for our money in the most desirable neighborhood possible- but it's looking like that's going to be hard to find.

Will is ready to settle for the first thing we see that's in our budget, needs little to no work and is near a fire department he'd want to join. I'm willing to do a bit of work to be able to afford a larger piece of property and bigger rooms and the school district is much more important to me than the Fire Department. Plus, I value my parents' opinions because they've gone through this several times already- Will HATES that I listen to the advice of my parents. Oh well. . .even though we butt heads on a few issues, we are mostly on the same page.

My "must haves":

3+ Bedrooms

1.5+ Bathrooms

Full Basement

Large backyard

NOT on a main or high traffic road

Decent sized kitchen

Lots of closet space

Master Bedroom big enough for our King Size Bed

My "it would be nice-s":

Garage

Fireplace

Mid block location

Wood Floors

I really don't think we are asking for too much...but apparently our REA does. He keeps reminding me that "the perfect house doesn't exist." I'm not looking for perfect, but I'd like to come pretty damn close!

So, my new solution is to expand our search to include some areas further north and east (we've been focused on the south shore of western suffolk county- Lindenhurst, West Islip, Babylon, East Islip, Sayville). I'm now considering Islip Terrace (EI Schools), Oakdale, Bohemia, possibly Commack, Northport, Kings Park.

We'd like to have found something by this summer- so keep your fingers crossed!!

QOTD:

"How can you leave the past behind when it keeps finding ways to get to your heart? It reaches way down deep and tears you inside out til your torn apart."

~from RENT by Jonathan Larson~

PS- All of my tests at the Rheumatologist came back normal (even the ANA)- EXCEPT for my liver enzymes, which came back slightly elevated. I'm chalking this up to the xanax I was taking daily for a week or so. They said next time I come in they'll re-run the test, but I don't think I'm going to go in for the follow up. Next time I go to my PCP I'll ask them to re-check it. Since I have no joint or autoimmune disorders, I don't think I need the Rheumatologist. Thanks for the prayers!

Now what....

So, I spoke too soon. I went to the dr. the night of my last post for a follow up to some blood work he did and although most came back fine, he found that my anti-nuclear antibodies (ANA) were elevated. This could mean nothing or it could mean rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, or a bunch of other things. He wanted me to meet with a rheumatologist.

I had an appointment yesterday and the doc said he can't find anything wrong with me, but he's running some more bloods to see if there is a reason behind the elevated ANA. I'm praying that it's just a fluke and I'm one of the people who just have a higher lever than most.

Unfortunately, after only a week anxiety free, it's back again. Yuck.

I know I'll be fine, but it's still scary. I'm just trying to talk myself out of it. Unfortunately, it's not that easy.

I forced myself to go to a yoga class last night- since it was a workshop on yoga for stress and anxiety- and I'm soo glad I did. When I got home, I had an appetite and was more relaxed.

So, keep me in your prayers that everything comes back fine.

Til next time!

I'm baaaa-aaackk....

and feeling pretty darn good. Last month I got the call that I had an abnormal pap smear (ick.) and that I would have to go in for a cervical biopsy. Yikes! I was a bit freaked out because I have a virus that can cause frequent abnormal paps- but I've never had one before! I actually JUST had a normal pap in January, but since I switched doctors, I had another one done just a month later. THIS one came back slightly abnormal.

So, I went in for the biopsy with my sister holding my hand. It hurt. It wasn't unbearable- but it certainly wasn't comfortable either. Then it was just a waiting game. I was given the "no sex for 2 weeks" guidelines---ummm, what?! I leave for cabo in a week! >:-(

I was anxious about what the results would come back like on and off for the next week. I was terrified they would find invasive cancer (even though it would be nearly impossible for it to progress so quickly)- but I was determined not to let it ruin our trip to Cabo.

So, we flew off to Cabo on the March 19th. When we got settled at the hotel in I called my sister for an update on her doctor's appointment to see how my little kumquat (aka- future niece or nephew) was doing and she said that the doctor mentioned to her that she was meaning to call me to let me know my biopsies came back fine!!!!!!! Woo hoo!!! You have NO IDEA the weight that was lifted off my shoulders at that point. I probably should've been a little peeved about the whole breach of confidentiality- but WHATEVER. If anyone knows EVERYTHING about me- it's my sister.

I was so glad to get that news and be able to enjoy my vacation 100%! We stuck to the no sex rule for 9 days...that's enough right ;-) I was hoping to conceive a little "Lucas" (as in- Cabo San Lucas) but I don't think the time was right. Oh well.

Anyway- Cabo was awesome-I definitely want to go back someday. When and if we do, I would not stay at an all inclusive resort. I would stay somewhere closer to town and just eat and drink there. The most I drank all week was when we were paying for it at Mango Deck- a really fun bar right on the beach near the arch.

I'll post some pics tomorrow! More soon!

QOTD:

"We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can. "

~*Will Rogers*~

Again...

Going through an anxious period again. Hopefully will feel better soon. I feel like the hits keep on coming. Thank god for my supportive family and husband.

I'll update when I'm feeling better.

That was rough....

This weekend we had to attend the wake and funeral services for my cousin. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do. The sheer number of people who showed up at the wakes (over 500!!!) were proof that both she and her family are well loved. She had friends from all walks of life.

If Lauren taught me anything in her short life- it would be the importance of telling people you love them. I've since started ending my phone calls and emails with family members and close friends with "I love you."